This Victim type can be very easy to seduce...if you want to do it. Everyone wants to shine for something at some point, but Crushed Stars want it more and more often than the rest of us. Why? Because they are/ were Stars.
They got used to the attention and, now that they no longer have it, they long for it. They were the center of attention, liked it, but are no longer in the midst of the action. They no longer make a party a success simply by showing up. People no longer get excited at the mere mention of their name. Fans no longer throng them.
Crushed Stars are not necessarily a huge name that you may have heard before (a movie star, athlete, or politician that was paid millions for what they did). He or she might have been a hometown hero, a small time football star, a leader in a local community, or whatever--but everyone knew them. The point is that those days are gone, and the Crushed Star wants them back.
To Recognize:
1. When they receive attention, socially, they will begin to glow (they are Stars after all, just dimmed a little over time).
2. They will speak of Glory Days, and there will be a happy glint in their eye.
3. Get them to loosen up and they will become bubbly and charm those around them.
To Seduce:
1. Make them the center of attention: For the Crushed Star this may as well be the only rule. Your victim lacks attention. Give it to them. If you don't know how, think of what they loved or did. To begin, keep reading.
2. Act as if they are the sun and you are basking in their radiance.
3. Get them to talk (especially about themselves).
4. Socially, mute yourself and make them look amazing.
In seducing a Crushed Star, those that seduce by charm will shine. Charmers, enter into the seduction of a Crushed Star and you may have found the perfect Victim. Charm them and they will become grateful to you (you let them shine, made them feel as if they could), release their pent up intensity, and fall in love with you.
If you are a Star or Dandy, do NOT seduce a Crushed Star. Eventually, you will want the limelight as well and you will lose your victim. And the competition for the limelight can get ugly.
Happy Seducing.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
A quick note for beginners
Ladies and Gentlemen,
I was having a conversation with a friend last night and realized that not everyone can tell when a man likes a woman, or when a woman likes a man. Therefore, I will give a very brief introduction to the first step of seduction:
Step #1: Choose the right victim!
You must choose someone who responds to you in some way. If they do not seem interested in you, then they will not react to you when you try to seduce them.
How to choose the right victim (short list):
1. They need to have a void that you can fill: this doesn't mean that you should find people that have to lean on "someone" emotionally, physically, or in any other way. Those people don't have a need, they are Needy--and it doesn't matter if it's you they cling to or someone else.
2. Your victim should be attractive to you in some way: he's handsome, she's witty, he's romantic, she's ambitious--whatever it is that attracts you to them. If you don't find someone at least a little attractive, it will be more work than play to seduce them. The Game of Seduction should always feel like play, even though a little work is mixed in.
"It is a stroke of good fortune to find one who is worth seducing.... Most people rush ahead, become engaged or do other stupid things, and in a turn of the hand everything is over, and they know neither what they have won nor what they have lost."
-Soren Kierkegaard
3. Study them: find out as much as you can about your victim before proceeding with the actual seduction. There is no need to let them know you are doing this. In fact, if you are not talking to them about themselves, DON'T mention this. People are by turns flattered, offended, or put off by the fact that you may be researching them. Don't tell them. If you talk to their family/ friends/ associates, let them find out about this indirectly and as the questions of those associates as indirectly as possible. Try to let the conversations happen in passing.
*****You must do this to find what their needs are.
4. The perfect victim for you, depends on you.
No one's perfect victim is the same as another's. Look at your friends and associates--not all of you date the same type of people (let alone the same people) because you do not want the same things. Also, everyone does not respond to you the same way. So the next time your friend has a date or a chosen victim and you don't, don't worry about it. You're just waiting for someone worth seducing.
Also, remember this: The person needs to react to you. They have to be interested in you in some way as well. If they aren't, you are wasting your time. Only seduce those who are reactive to you--these are the seduceable ones. If they never seek your presence, don't enjoy your presence, never smile or joke or ask you about how things are going for you (in a more personal way than just politeness), they are not interested.
You could probably get them that way, but it takes so much more work than seducing someone already susceptible. As a beginner, stay away from this. Learn to play the game before moving onto expert levels.
Enjoy your game.
I was having a conversation with a friend last night and realized that not everyone can tell when a man likes a woman, or when a woman likes a man. Therefore, I will give a very brief introduction to the first step of seduction:
Step #1: Choose the right victim!
You must choose someone who responds to you in some way. If they do not seem interested in you, then they will not react to you when you try to seduce them.
How to choose the right victim (short list):
1. They need to have a void that you can fill: this doesn't mean that you should find people that have to lean on "someone" emotionally, physically, or in any other way. Those people don't have a need, they are Needy--and it doesn't matter if it's you they cling to or someone else.
2. Your victim should be attractive to you in some way: he's handsome, she's witty, he's romantic, she's ambitious--whatever it is that attracts you to them. If you don't find someone at least a little attractive, it will be more work than play to seduce them. The Game of Seduction should always feel like play, even though a little work is mixed in.
"It is a stroke of good fortune to find one who is worth seducing.... Most people rush ahead, become engaged or do other stupid things, and in a turn of the hand everything is over, and they know neither what they have won nor what they have lost."
-Soren Kierkegaard
3. Study them: find out as much as you can about your victim before proceeding with the actual seduction. There is no need to let them know you are doing this. In fact, if you are not talking to them about themselves, DON'T mention this. People are by turns flattered, offended, or put off by the fact that you may be researching them. Don't tell them. If you talk to their family/ friends/ associates, let them find out about this indirectly and as the questions of those associates as indirectly as possible. Try to let the conversations happen in passing.
*****You must do this to find what their needs are.
4. The perfect victim for you, depends on you.
No one's perfect victim is the same as another's. Look at your friends and associates--not all of you date the same type of people (let alone the same people) because you do not want the same things. Also, everyone does not respond to you the same way. So the next time your friend has a date or a chosen victim and you don't, don't worry about it. You're just waiting for someone worth seducing.
Also, remember this: The person needs to react to you. They have to be interested in you in some way as well. If they aren't, you are wasting your time. Only seduce those who are reactive to you--these are the seduceable ones. If they never seek your presence, don't enjoy your presence, never smile or joke or ask you about how things are going for you (in a more personal way than just politeness), they are not interested.
You could probably get them that way, but it takes so much more work than seducing someone already susceptible. As a beginner, stay away from this. Learn to play the game before moving onto expert levels.
Enjoy your game.
The New Prude
Prudery isn't what you think...well, it is and it's not. It's not really about sex. It's about appearances.
Prudes are so ultra focused on what others (usually society) deems correct that they are unwilling to take risks, and they don't like others doing so either. Or so you may think. Yes, Prudes criticize--perhaps even try to enforce their standards on you--but they don't really want you to abide them.
Recognize them:
1. Recognize them by the clothes they wear (drab colors, no fashion risks ever).
2. They are critical, talking about those risk-takers and less correct people.
3. They're addicted to routine.
Seduce them:
1. They're excited by the naughtier pleasures, but frightenened by them at the same time.
2. They are secretly oppressed by their own correctness.
3.They're strongly tempted by anything with a dangerous/ naughty side.
Don't be put off by judgements or criticism--it only proves how much you are on their mind. They think of you, even when you aren't there. You need this to seduce anyone. Also, remember that once they open up, their feelings pour out to you. They are only waiting for someone to seduce them.
Prudes are so ultra focused on what others (usually society) deems correct that they are unwilling to take risks, and they don't like others doing so either. Or so you may think. Yes, Prudes criticize--perhaps even try to enforce their standards on you--but they don't really want you to abide them.
Recognize them:
1. Recognize them by the clothes they wear (drab colors, no fashion risks ever).
2. They are critical, talking about those risk-takers and less correct people.
3. They're addicted to routine.
Seduce them:
1. They're excited by the naughtier pleasures, but frightenened by them at the same time.
2. They are secretly oppressed by their own correctness.
3.They're strongly tempted by anything with a dangerous/ naughty side.
Don't be put off by judgements or criticism--it only proves how much you are on their mind. They think of you, even when you aren't there. You need this to seduce anyone. Also, remember that once they open up, their feelings pour out to you. They are only waiting for someone to seduce them.
Monday, March 16, 2009
The Pampered Royal
These Victims were likely spoiled as children; thus they grew a bit lazy in their lives. When they grow up and their parents are no longer there to pamper them and provide distraction, they must look to others to provide it. That is where you, as Seducer, come in.
To seduce them:
1. Be ready to provide distraction--travel, spectacle, new experiences, especially places they've never been or things they've never done.
2. Variety: vary what you do, what you provide them with, and when. They'll grow bored otherwise.
3. Maintain an air of mystery; keep yourself interesting to them.
4. If you want a long-term relationship, hide it. You'll panic them. (And you'll be doing most of the work in the relationship anyway.)
Recognizing them: they have great turmoil in thier past--job changes, travel, numerous short-term relationships, etc.
Once you have done these things and hooked your Pampered Royal, they will become dependent on you. Then, things get easier. Still provide what you have before, but not necessarily as often. They still are dependent on you for their happiness.
To seduce them:
1. Be ready to provide distraction--travel, spectacle, new experiences, especially places they've never been or things they've never done.
2. Variety: vary what you do, what you provide them with, and when. They'll grow bored otherwise.
3. Maintain an air of mystery; keep yourself interesting to them.
4. If you want a long-term relationship, hide it. You'll panic them. (And you'll be doing most of the work in the relationship anyway.)
Recognizing them: they have great turmoil in thier past--job changes, travel, numerous short-term relationships, etc.
Once you have done these things and hooked your Pampered Royal, they will become dependent on you. Then, things get easier. Still provide what you have before, but not necessarily as often. They still are dependent on you for their happiness.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
The Disappointed Dreamer
These people are very idealistic. They tend to fantasize quite a bit about what they want their lives to be like, what they will do, who they will meet and how. So, when they get let down by life, they really get let down. Dreams shatter, hearts break, and they're forced to begin again.
To seduce these people:
1. They want their fantasy. Your job is to give it to them. Find out what it is.
2. Human frailties put them off. Hide yours as much as you can.
3. Concerns bogging down every day life put them off. Hide your own and help them forget theirs.
Recognizing this type isn't so very hard--look at the books they read, movies they watch, etc. And watch for reactions when others talk about adventure, real life adventure. If they perk up and become animated for you when you tell the story of one of your own real-life adventures, they may be a disappointed dreamer.
To seduce these people:
1. They want their fantasy. Your job is to give it to them. Find out what it is.
2. Human frailties put them off. Hide yours as much as you can.
3. Concerns bogging down every day life put them off. Hide your own and help them forget theirs.
Recognizing this type isn't so very hard--look at the books they read, movies they watch, etc. And watch for reactions when others talk about adventure, real life adventure. If they perk up and become animated for you when you tell the story of one of your own real-life adventures, they may be a disappointed dreamer.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
The Reformed Rake/Siren
These Victims are used to having their way with the opposite but, for whatever reason, they gave up their rakish ways. Deep down, they long to have them back.
If you want to seduce this type, do the following:
1. Spark them indirectly, DON't approach them. Give them a little come hither look.
2. Provide them with opportunities to seduce you--that is what they want. (They used to do it all the time.)
3. DON'T offer them another relationship. OFFER fun, a chase.
4. If you do want a relationship with them, hide it. They will run if you don't.
Remember, this type can be inherently unfaithful. They like the challenge, the chase. If you offer another relationship, they feel bogged down and will move on as soon as they can.
If you want to seduce this type, do the following:
1. Spark them indirectly, DON't approach them. Give them a little come hither look.
2. Provide them with opportunities to seduce you--that is what they want. (They used to do it all the time.)
3. DON'T offer them another relationship. OFFER fun, a chase.
4. If you do want a relationship with them, hide it. They will run if you don't.
Remember, this type can be inherently unfaithful. They like the challenge, the chase. If you offer another relationship, they feel bogged down and will move on as soon as they can.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Targets
We call our targets Victims but, in reality, they are nearly always willing victims. They play the game just as you do. Don't forget this. There are some that will try to deny this if a romance ends. It is untrue. Both they and you knew the risks when you started the game.
The game should be fun. Do not take it too seriously. Knowing that, continue to read.
Everyone is lacking something in their lives that they are unable (or seemingly unable) to provide for themselves. This lack is what we seek in others, the void that we want them to fill for us. Look for what your victim lacks. That is what you need to provide for them.
To find what your Vicitm lacks, look at a number of things: clothing, gestures, offhand comments, things they keep in their house, looks in their eyes, and get them to talk about their past (especially romance and relationships). People are constantly broadcasting signals as to what thye lack in hopes that someone will pick up on it and provide it for them. Pay attention and you'll see it. Remember to look beyond the appearance that people put forward. They will say many things; find the reality of what they lack, not what they say they lack.
DO NOT assume that everyone lacks what you do. They don't. You may crave security, others will despise it. You may dream of forever, others only want now--forever frightens them.
And remember this cardinal principle (DON'T break it): NEVER SEDUCE YOUR OWN KIND.
You lack the same things and can never fulfill one another.
The game should be fun. Do not take it too seriously. Knowing that, continue to read.
Everyone is lacking something in their lives that they are unable (or seemingly unable) to provide for themselves. This lack is what we seek in others, the void that we want them to fill for us. Look for what your victim lacks. That is what you need to provide for them.
To find what your Vicitm lacks, look at a number of things: clothing, gestures, offhand comments, things they keep in their house, looks in their eyes, and get them to talk about their past (especially romance and relationships). People are constantly broadcasting signals as to what thye lack in hopes that someone will pick up on it and provide it for them. Pay attention and you'll see it. Remember to look beyond the appearance that people put forward. They will say many things; find the reality of what they lack, not what they say they lack.
DO NOT assume that everyone lacks what you do. They don't. You may crave security, others will despise it. You may dream of forever, others only want now--forever frightens them.
And remember this cardinal principle (DON'T break it): NEVER SEDUCE YOUR OWN KIND.
You lack the same things and can never fulfill one another.
In Awe of the Natural
As our final Seducer type, The Natural causes awe in us because he/ she has actually managed to maintained child-like qualities that charm, fascinate, woo us. They're unpretentious, sincere, spontaneous, playful, and make us think of our own childhoods when we were that carefree too. That is how they woo us.
Adult life is full of boredom, compromise, and disillusionment. The Natural seems unaffected by all this, maintaining whatever traits they have protected sicne childhood. There are many different types and they can blur with one another, but here are some basic types:
1. the innocent: They seem weak because we all know that innocence can only really last for so long before it gets beaten into the ground. They also misunderstand many things in the world, seeming to be uncorrupted. The possible loss of innocence saddens us and we find the misunderstandings humorous.
2. the imp: They're brazen, fearless. They don't seem to see the consequences of their actions--they won't see if they offend someone or if what they do may cause injury to themselves. If they do, they do it anyway and don't worry about the consquences. These Naturals are always on full throttle, don't take anything seriously, and the only thought for offending others is that they will be forgiven eventually. =)
3. the wonder: These people were prodigies as children. They have some kind of skill that they make look easy to every one else. In truth they have to work at it like the rest of us (even if the aptitude is natural), they just hide it much better. The qualities they need to help them with the skill come naturally. It fascinates because so many wish that they could be like this, talented beyond their years and experience. Taking this strategy requires any natural skill and improvization. Become so practiced that you make it look simple.
4. the undefensive lover: These people are so open, easy, and accepting of others that they are very nearly irresistable. As we grow we eventually get hurt by others and most people close up and build defenses because of it. These people don't. They are graceful, relaxed, hard to offend, and may seem to age slower than others. The defensiveness found in so many is a death to seduction. Your defensiveness brings out the same reactions in others; the lack of it, relaxes everyone around you and they want to be near you. Then, the victims inhibitions are lowered because the undefensive lover bends, felxes, and is as open as they need to be at the time.
One of the best peoplea t this was Charlie Chaplin. No one in Hollywood would tell you that he was an extremely handsome leadin man. In fact, they may not really even know what the draw in him was. but he was funny, unpretentious, unafraid of making a fool of himself. He was a master at putting his audience at ease and making them enjoy his roles and personality. They fell in love with him before they even knew they were in danger of it.
DANGERS:
1. Childness is eventually annoying. You have to be able to tone it down or turn it off when you need to. Combine the childishness with adult experience and wisdom and the contradiction is more seductive than either alone.
2. The older you are, the harder it can become to pull off the Natural. Eventually those around you just want you to grow up. Be able to adapt and improvise to your environment and the needs of others.
To all you Naturals, enjoy yourself and thoes around you will nearly always be charmed and lose themselves in your carefree laughter, spontaneity, etc. This is seduction. Make it fun.
Adult life is full of boredom, compromise, and disillusionment. The Natural seems unaffected by all this, maintaining whatever traits they have protected sicne childhood. There are many different types and they can blur with one another, but here are some basic types:
1. the innocent: They seem weak because we all know that innocence can only really last for so long before it gets beaten into the ground. They also misunderstand many things in the world, seeming to be uncorrupted. The possible loss of innocence saddens us and we find the misunderstandings humorous.
2. the imp: They're brazen, fearless. They don't seem to see the consequences of their actions--they won't see if they offend someone or if what they do may cause injury to themselves. If they do, they do it anyway and don't worry about the consquences. These Naturals are always on full throttle, don't take anything seriously, and the only thought for offending others is that they will be forgiven eventually. =)
3. the wonder: These people were prodigies as children. They have some kind of skill that they make look easy to every one else. In truth they have to work at it like the rest of us (even if the aptitude is natural), they just hide it much better. The qualities they need to help them with the skill come naturally. It fascinates because so many wish that they could be like this, talented beyond their years and experience. Taking this strategy requires any natural skill and improvization. Become so practiced that you make it look simple.
4. the undefensive lover: These people are so open, easy, and accepting of others that they are very nearly irresistable. As we grow we eventually get hurt by others and most people close up and build defenses because of it. These people don't. They are graceful, relaxed, hard to offend, and may seem to age slower than others. The defensiveness found in so many is a death to seduction. Your defensiveness brings out the same reactions in others; the lack of it, relaxes everyone around you and they want to be near you. Then, the victims inhibitions are lowered because the undefensive lover bends, felxes, and is as open as they need to be at the time.
One of the best peoplea t this was Charlie Chaplin. No one in Hollywood would tell you that he was an extremely handsome leadin man. In fact, they may not really even know what the draw in him was. but he was funny, unpretentious, unafraid of making a fool of himself. He was a master at putting his audience at ease and making them enjoy his roles and personality. They fell in love with him before they even knew they were in danger of it.
DANGERS:
1. Childness is eventually annoying. You have to be able to tone it down or turn it off when you need to. Combine the childishness with adult experience and wisdom and the contradiction is more seductive than either alone.
2. The older you are, the harder it can become to pull off the Natural. Eventually those around you just want you to grow up. Be able to adapt and improvise to your environment and the needs of others.
To all you Naturals, enjoy yourself and thoes around you will nearly always be charmed and lose themselves in your carefree laughter, spontaneity, etc. This is seduction. Make it fun.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
A Key I Learned Recently
Ladies, Gentlemen, and Fellow Seducers,
In the course of the past few weeks, I have been ill. Some would see that as a set back--not me. There are lessons to be learned in the midst of it and here are a few of them:
1. Illness is not seductive-- Being ill, you will nearly always look your absolute worst. This is even worse than wking with terrible morning breath. You feel sick, look sick, and smell that way too. If the object of your affection has any chance of seeing you, try to do what you can to alleviate these setbacks. And try to be optimistic in you illness.
2. Needing people is seductive-- In any situation, people are flattered when you ask for their help. This increases when you are ill. You have appealed to their vanity and humbled yourself in asking for their help at all. And you're ill--even if the person did not seem especially attracted to you, you have (by asking for help) given them the opportunity to feel needed and look attractive for others. Congratulations, you have made them feel better.
3. Optimism is seductive-- No matter how terrible your situation (and I have been in a few terrible ones myself), remember to be optimistic about things. People will say what a good outlook and attitude you have on everything, how uplifting it is to see you, and they will want to visit you. Just think how depressing it is to spend time around negative people. You don't really ever want to be there. We all have negative moments, but the less we show them to others, the more seductive we become. **Also, remember to show that you do know what is happening, the situation you're in, the consequences or possible badnews that is looming over you--and still remain happy in spite of it.
Always find the silver lining and people will enjoy you more for it. You don't have to be incredibly perky, only confident in life and yourself. Once again, confidence is key.
Happy seductions.
In the course of the past few weeks, I have been ill. Some would see that as a set back--not me. There are lessons to be learned in the midst of it and here are a few of them:
1. Illness is not seductive-- Being ill, you will nearly always look your absolute worst. This is even worse than wking with terrible morning breath. You feel sick, look sick, and smell that way too. If the object of your affection has any chance of seeing you, try to do what you can to alleviate these setbacks. And try to be optimistic in you illness.
2. Needing people is seductive-- In any situation, people are flattered when you ask for their help. This increases when you are ill. You have appealed to their vanity and humbled yourself in asking for their help at all. And you're ill--even if the person did not seem especially attracted to you, you have (by asking for help) given them the opportunity to feel needed and look attractive for others. Congratulations, you have made them feel better.
3. Optimism is seductive-- No matter how terrible your situation (and I have been in a few terrible ones myself), remember to be optimistic about things. People will say what a good outlook and attitude you have on everything, how uplifting it is to see you, and they will want to visit you. Just think how depressing it is to spend time around negative people. You don't really ever want to be there. We all have negative moments, but the less we show them to others, the more seductive we become. **Also, remember to show that you do know what is happening, the situation you're in, the consequences or possible badnews that is looming over you--and still remain happy in spite of it.
Always find the silver lining and people will enjoy you more for it. You don't have to be incredibly perky, only confident in life and yourself. Once again, confidence is key.
Happy seductions.
Friday, March 6, 2009
Apologies, dear Readers...
Dear Readers,
My deepest apologies for once again being forced to lapse from the usual M/W/F updating regimen. I was ill but am now back and better than ever. And seduction is on the menu for today.
Let's continue with our lessons.
My deepest apologies for once again being forced to lapse from the usual M/W/F updating regimen. I was ill but am now back and better than ever. And seduction is on the menu for today.
Let's continue with our lessons.
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