The world we live in is full of harsh realitites, but who wants them! None of us really. There are some of us more susceptible to such fantasies than others, however.
Ideal Lovers thrive on broken and repressed dreams, dreams that we don't believe can come true anymore. Those harsh realities have smashed our hope that we could have our dreams. Therefore, a good lover uses that to his/her advantage--reflecting whatever your dream is back to you and making the illusion you need. For instance, most of us have to run back and forth to work, school, sports practice, rehearsals, cook dinner, do laundry, get some sleep, and more--all while trying to look nice for the opposite sex. So we rush from appointment to appointment, just trying to make the day go by twenty minutes faster so that we can get home a little earlier.
What does the Ideal Lover do? While he/she probably has all the same things to do, they never rush through their time with you. They linger as much as possible, acting as though they can never have enough of you.
"A good lover will behave as elegantly at dawn as at any other time." (The Pillow Book of Sei Shonagon) In other words, after spending an enjoyable night together, the Ideal Lover does not hurriedly gather his things and rush off. No. He takes as long as he can, acting as though every movement bringing him closer to leaving you pains him. Then, when he must leave, he spends that extra moment pulling you in for a warm, langorous kiss before taking his leave.
Casanova was the most successful male Ideal Lover, and Madame de Pompadour the most successful female. Why?
Keys:
1. Observe. Observe. Observe:
Your job as the Ideal Lover is to find what people lack, what dreams have been shattered. Therefore, ignore the conscious things that they do and say, and focus on the involuntary things (a blush, a look, etc) and learn what they are not saying.
"Our ideal may be buried in disappointment, but it lurks underneath, waiting to be sparked. If another person seems to have that ideal quality, or to have the ability to bring it out in us, we fall in love....[Ideal Lovers do] not merely seduce their targets into a sexual affair, they make them fall in love." (The Art of Seduction, 36).
Now is the perfect time for the Ideal Lover. First, because we (as people in society) must always seem well-intentioned. Power is taboo. Speaking of Power is more taboo, because there is nothing noble or spiritually elevating about it. And Second, because few people see through the Ideal Lover--and that makes the seduction last longer.
2. Ambiguity:
Combine sensitivity with pleasure, an air of innocence with spiritual and sensibility. Mix high and low qualitites (sensuality with innocence, etc); the combination is enigmatic and seductive.
Remember, people are always vulnerable to insinuation, especially if it strokes their vanity. Hint that you see some untapped potential in them, some wonderful inspiring thing, and they will be yours. You are appealing to a person's "higher self" (their vanity, really). We always want to believe that we are better than we really are.
Politicians do this to an entire nation by pulling symbols from the country's past, bringing former ideals back to the surface. The reality behind the symbols doesn't matter, only the positive feelings that they stir in the people. Those feelings will undoubtedly be transferred to the politician.
Dangers:
1. Reality must be kept away. If it creeps in, then your own faults will burst your victim's bubble and you will bear the force of the explosion.
2.Also, reality and long, intimate exposure dull a person's perfection. Distance is often the solution to this.
3.Lastly, be prudent and keep people from seeing you imperfections as much as possible. Your reputation may or may not survive it.
One final thought, Ideal Lovers always bring out the nobler qualities in their victims, make them seem wonderful and godlike; and for this they are rewarded with great power. Their Victim has come to love them. Love, itself, is a source of power.
No comments:
Post a Comment